I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
You should frame my arrest warrant.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
Randomize
