He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
Randomize