Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
i barfeds in our rink
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
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