Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
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Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
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Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
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