Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
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