Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
Randomize
