Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
you will always have a special place in my vag
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
Randomize
