a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Randomize
