I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
Randomize
