I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
the liver wants what the liver wants
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
Randomize
