I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
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