At least make sure they are 18
Why
That chick was all over your bacon last night, grinding on you, I thought you were going to bang her in the club
Dude it was a lap dance
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Randomize
