Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
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