why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
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