am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
My boob is missing a layer of skin
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
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