Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
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