I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
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From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
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