Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
