Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize
