He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
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Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
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Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
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