on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Randomize
