Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
Randomize
