I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
Randomize
