Apparently you make a good broom.
Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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