I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
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