Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(313): View more from Michigan

I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support

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(313): I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support http://tfl.nu/by3u

Replies (70) Good night (1343) Bad night (826)
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(214): View more from Texas

I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot

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(214): I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot http://tfl.nu/eus9

Replies (14) Good night (4627) Bad night (1185)
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(207): View more from Maine

can u get pink eye on your cock?

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(207): can u get pink eye on your cock? http://tfl.nu/aw6r

Replies (19) Good night (724) Bad night (5593)
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(443): View more from Maryland

hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?

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(443): hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"? http://tfl.nu/cmo1

Replies (23) Good night (1382) Bad night (5562)
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(423): View more from Tennessee

I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.

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(423): I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant. http://tfl.nu/k43z

Replies (9) Good night (825) Bad night (2064)
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(315): View more from New York

You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning

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(315): You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning http://tfl.nu/dkck

Replies (8) Good night (3688) Bad night (851)
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(918): View more from Oklahoma

The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.

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(918): The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals. http://tfl.nu/o5rq

Replies (4) Good night (2259) Bad night (1857)
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(505): View more from New Mexico

TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES

(1-505): View more from New Mexico

This is going everywhere on the internet.

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(505): TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES (1-505): This is going everywhere on the internet. http://tfl.nu/lcfu

Replies (8) Good night (3166) Bad night (955)
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(253): View more from Washington

Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night

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(253): Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night http://tfl.nu/3m0v

Replies (4) Good night (1122) Bad night (958)
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(210): View more from Texas

I want to own their dicks and all the attachments

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(210): I want to own their dicks and all the attachments http://tfl.nu/6rti

Replies (1) Good night (879) Bad night (481)
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(479): View more from Arkansas

Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.

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(479): Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success. http://tfl.nu/y7jz

Replies (4) Good night (2545) Bad night (439)
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(815): View more from Illinois

I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.

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(815): I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that. http://tfl.nu/ueu2

Replies (1) Good night (578) Bad night (298)
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(401): View more from Rhode Island

Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.

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(401): Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry. http://tfl.nu/awxp

Replies (1) Good night (356) Bad night (679)
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(516): View more from New York

dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me

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(516): dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me http://tfl.nu/r9vy

Replies (4) Good night (547) Bad night (205)
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(863): View more from Florida

You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.

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(863): You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise. http://tfl.nu/26lw

Replies (0) Good night (414) Bad night (195)

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