Texts From Last Night

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  (418): View more from Quebec

  I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate

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  (418): I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate http://tfl.nu/4k8x
  Replies (5) Good night (1752) Bad night (729)
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  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.

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  (405): It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother. http://tfl.nu/gdyr
  Replies (42) Good night (1157) Bad night (2748)
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  (512): View more from Texas

  remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning

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  (512): remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning http://tfl.nu/4vog
  Replies (15) Good night (1422) Bad night (3754)
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  (815): View more from Illinois

  Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here

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  (815): Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here http://tfl.nu/3q8i
  Replies (36) Good night (1080) Bad night (6332)
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  (773): View more from Illinois

  She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs

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  (773): She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs http://tfl.nu/4ami
  Replies (26) Good night (6577) Bad night (1625)
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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.

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  (978): Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either. http://tfl.nu/z8zq
  Replies (25) Good night (1768) Bad night (3483)
• Favorite

  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"

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  (918): As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy" http://tfl.nu/glce
  Replies (9) Good night (3332) Bad night (1056)
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  (641): View more from Iowa

  We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.

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  (641): We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard. http://tfl.nu/xmhj
  Replies (12) Good night (4430) Bad night (1169)
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  (931): View more from Tennessee

  Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....

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  (931): Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me.... http://tfl.nu/xfhz
  Replies (11) Good night (1620) Bad night (3716)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.

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  (203): Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off. http://tfl.nu/jh7m
  Replies (5) Good night (440) Bad night (991)
• Favorite

  (714): View more from California

  I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.

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  (714): I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like. http://tfl.nu/0ztf
  Replies (0) Good night (601) Bad night (322)
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  (408): View more from California

  I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.

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  (408): I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms. http://tfl.nu/0beo
  Replies (2) Good night (524) Bad night (692)
• Favorite

  (916): View more from California

  I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.

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  (916): I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings. http://tfl.nu/ki9y
  Replies (2) Good night (749) Bad night (298)
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.

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  (716): So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great. http://tfl.nu/0vjk
  Replies (2) Good night (298) Bad night (379)
• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.

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  (330): A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent. http://tfl.nu/mkyo
  Replies (4) Good night (614) Bad night (222)

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