i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
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