he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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