Texts From Last Night

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  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.

  (1-202): View more from Washington, DC

  I mean not really

  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.

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  (202): Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult. (1-202): I mean not really (202): Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible. http://tfl.nu/azl7
  Replies (25) Good night (2928) Bad night (822)
• Favorite

  (301): View more from Maryland

  I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined

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  (301): I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined http://tfl.nu/iip9
  Replies (19) Good night (958) Bad night (3191)
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  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts

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  (484): I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts http://tfl.nu/21q5
  Replies (6) Good night (4269) Bad night (1040)
• Favorite

  (620): View more from Kansas

  I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.

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  (620): I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful. http://tfl.nu/8ema
  Replies (9) Good night (5371) Bad night (927)
• Favorite

  (917): View more from New York City

  I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.

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  (917): I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober. http://tfl.nu/rgt7
  Replies (7) Good night (4558) Bad night (1196)
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"

  (1-410): View more from Maryland

  How come I never meet celebrities?

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  (410): Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield" (1-410): How come I never meet celebrities? http://tfl.nu/j09q
  Replies (7) Good night (3560) Bad night (894)
• Favorite

  (904): View more from Florida

  Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.

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  (904): Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover. http://tfl.nu/qk4i
  Replies (3) Good night (1594) Bad night (949)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.

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  (+44): The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself. http://tfl.nu/y3oz
  Replies (4) Good night (899) Bad night (2120)
• Favorite

  (518): View more from New York

  The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.

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  (518): The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession. http://tfl.nu/a7rm
  Replies (18) Good night (1453) Bad night (3770)
• Favorite

  (916): View more from California

  Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home

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  (916): Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home http://tfl.nu/dlwc
  Replies (3) Good night (706) Bad night (1721)
• Favorite

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight

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  (508): And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight http://tfl.nu/ebf5
  Replies (6) Good night (1911) Bad night (611)
• Favorite

  (913): View more from Kansas

  My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?

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  (913): My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot? http://tfl.nu/qatl
  Replies (5) Good night (1237) Bad night (526)
• Favorite

  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.

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  (401): I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE. http://tfl.nu/jvh7
  Replies (8) Good night (632) Bad night (1672)
• Favorite

  (435): View more from Utah

  Thanks for fucking me in last night

  (435): View more from Utah

  TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT

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  (435): Thanks for fucking me in last night (435): TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT http://tfl.nu/3wzm
  Replies (10) Good night (1641) Bad night (412)
• Favorite

  (631): View more from New York

  My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?

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  (631): My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right? http://tfl.nu/9a0f
  Replies (1) Good night (613) Bad night (232)

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