Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (901): View more from Tennessee

  1:32 am: your girlfriend looks like a man

  (423): View more from Tennessee

  1:48 am: your uglier

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (901) 1:32 am: your girlfriend looks like a man (423) 1:48 am: your uglier http://tfl.nu/ln5v
  Replies (6) Good night (1212) Bad night (1751)
• Favorite

  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (484): drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart. http://tfl.nu/h0kh
  Replies (14) Good night (1127) Bad night (2770)
• Favorite

  (440): View more from Ohio

  so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (440): so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce http://tfl.nu/bsub
  Replies (22) Good night (3018) Bad night (1201)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from England

  I just gift wrapped bread.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+44): I just gift wrapped bread. http://tfl.nu/h0i1
  Replies (8) Good night (4767) Bad night (726)
• Favorite

  (864): View more from South Carolina

  U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (864): U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating" http://tfl.nu/kntp
  Replies (14) Good night (5225) Bad night (996)
• Favorite

  (913): View more from Kansas

  just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (913): just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home. http://tfl.nu/c9s9
  Replies (45) Good night (12024) Bad night (1280)
• Favorite

  (970): View more from Colorado

  I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (970): I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more. http://tfl.nu/19ra
  Replies (3) Good night (2723) Bad night (831)
• Favorite

  (973): View more from New Jersey

  not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (973): not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down http://tfl.nu/e11q
  Replies (6) Good night (4189) Bad night (1149)
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"

  (1-410): View more from Maryland

  How come I never meet celebrities?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (410): Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield" (1-410): How come I never meet celebrities? http://tfl.nu/j09q
  Replies (7) Good night (3485) Bad night (830)
• Favorite

  (720): View more from Colorado

  He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (720): He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples." http://tfl.nu/rub1
  Replies (8) Good night (4567) Bad night (904)
• Favorite

  (562): View more from California

  I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (562): I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me. http://tfl.nu/m5b0
  Replies (1) Good night (602) Bad night (1025)
• Favorite

  (325): View more from Texas

  3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (325): 3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches! http://tfl.nu/avjf
  Replies (7) Good night (2289) Bad night (845)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (310): True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant? http://tfl.nu/aiag
  Replies (6) Good night (1064) Bad night (1650)
• Favorite

  (+61): View more from Australia

  BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON

  (+61): View more from Australia

  SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE

  (+61): View more from Australia

  THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+61): BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON (+61): SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE (+61): THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL. http://tfl.nu/d007
  Replies (9) Good night (1382) Bad night (438)
• Favorite

  (714): View more from California

  Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (714): Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down http://tfl.nu/a62b
  Replies (0) Good night (383) Bad night (178)

Randomize