Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
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i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
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