btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
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