hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
Can you repeat that, but with context?
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
Randomize
