As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
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