David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
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