heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
Actions speak louder than pants.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
Randomize