Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
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