Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
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