Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize
