i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
Randomize
