Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
it's great music for shaving your balls
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
I think I just shit out all my problems.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Randomize
