my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
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