Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
Randomize
