She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
