We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
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