Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
On today's episode of "What the Shit Did I Do Last Night," drunk me deleted ALL of the text messages I've ever had. Awesome.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Randomize
