just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
Aw. You're having cute FaceTime with your fiance, I'm trying to convince myself not to booty call a 42 year old. #adulting
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Randomize