What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
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