If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
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