I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
When I told my mom I was having a rough time, she responded with "pop a xanax, take a nap, and when you wake up all will be right with the world." My mom is finally starting to shape up.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
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