He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
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Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
I just crop dusted the hot FedEx guy delivering my business cards...then asked him "Was that you?" How the fuck am I allowed to be an adult?
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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